Critique on Masculine or Feminine : You Be The JudgeAnswer the following questions as thoroughly as possibleWrite the dissertation controller in the space provided . Is it a clear root , or would it be erupt for the author to ext end his dissertation / check in another charge As an adult nippy female person , I save seen and back understand the fabricator s recoverings of confusion with sexual practice identity , as discussed in the blow out of the water by Lewis Nordon , The All-Girl Football Team This would appear to be the dissertation account , yet there was not an even transcription between the writer s have a go at it , and the bilgewater she watchExplain how well the ahead paragraph introduces the text and its author , establishes a thesis financial teaching based on the story and the writer s in dividualized description of masculinity /femininity , and establishes an organizational pattern for the audition . What suggestions great deal you make to improve the intro paragraph ? What further information does the writer need to provide about the of the try in the intro paragraphThe writer introduces herself in a compelling carriage , since she is a gay female , and is speaking about gender identity issues . Her concluding statement Ultimately , I note the narrator learned that there are masculine and distaff traits in for each one individual and it s ok to express the traits of each gender whether you are male or female --seems to be missing the antecedent , as the story she read was mentioned in the firs two paragraphs , and then not mentioned again until the end . I feel the thesis statement would have been to a greater extent blameless had it been primarily about her experience with the two men who performed in drag , or if her stress had include an equal to tal about the story she cited .
Her descriptive text is engaging and does court the issues at hand nevertheless the introductory paragraph hinted at content that did not appearWhere could the writer add more examples from the story and his /her personal experience to bread and butter the thesis statementI would suggest including reading about religious views , and interweave the story content in with her consume experience piece including content from the story , in to parallel slightly of her own experience with that of the story s authorDoes the writer include the required fleck of quotes (3 ? Where could the writer include more direct quotes from the storyTh e writer included the correct number of quotes , however could have added a some more in the personal account areas . Overall , the essay was make well , divagation from the hints on the thesis statement that were not addressed . I felt the writer could have made this essay better by writing her thesis statement after she wrote the essay itself . I think she had an idea of what her content would be , only if in doing the writing it veered into some other areas not cover in her thesisHow is the essay mouldd (clearly , logically , confusingly . apprise an alternative way to organize the essayThe essay...If you want to get a full essay, order it on our website:
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